The past few days has been like bad.
I didn't want to use the word "hell" because...
Somehow I still want to maintain some hope there by telling myself that it is not the worst.
I got reprimanded almost everywhere I go, some I don't even know if it is legit.
Sigh.
From EN to classmate up to even DDN level.
I asked J if I was really so wrong that I have to be questioned by them in that way, I wasn't skiving, in fact I was vigorously typing my notes like never so energized before.
Why am I wrong?
J said she has no answer for it, and she concluded it by saying that I am just "unlucky".
Smirk.
Yeah.
Unlucky, like forever.
I tried.
Honestly.
Looking on the bright side by telling myself that it could have been worse, but how helpful is that by just being "unlucky".
It is just THAT SAD that I am always and can only be "unlucky".
Even Sel was asking "why are you getting chided everywhere you go?"
I look to God and I asked why.
Why me?
Why it happened?
Why?
No answer is the answer.
I could only be like that, in that way.
>_<.
No one understands.
Or may be I don't need that someone.
Just watched "When Marnie was There".
Felt it when Marnie disappeared without a word after she claimed that Anna was her best friend and will never leave Her and told Anna how much she favor her.
Anna couldn't understand why Marnie just took off like that, felt betrayed that the person she finally decided to trust walked out on her.
Two injured souls.
Love the song.
☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★
"Fine On The Outside"
I never had that many friends growing up
So I learned to be okay with just me
Just me, just me, just me
And I'll be just fine on the outside.
I like to eat in school by myself anyway
So I'll just stay right here
Right here, right here, right here
And I'll be fine on the outside
And so I just sit in my room
After hours with the moon
And think of who knows my name
Would you cry if I died?
Would you remember my face?
So I left home
I packed up and I moved far away
From my past one day
And I laughed
I laughed, I laughed, I laughed
I sound fine on the outside
Oh oh oh [4x]
Oh oh oh
Sometimes I feel lost sometimes I'm confused
Sometimes I find that I'm not alright
And I cry, and I cry, and I cry
Oh oh oh [4x]
Oh oh oh
So I just sit in my room
After hours with the moon
And think of who knows my name
Would you cry if I died?
Would you remember my face?
☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★☆★
"Who knows my name, would you cry if I died, would you remember my face?"
